Wednesday, September 19, 2007

Five Best...Songs about Masturbation

#5. "Darling Nikki" by Prince and the Revolution

Knew a girl named Nikki,
I guess you could say she was a sex fiend.
I met her in a hotel lobby,
Masturbating with a magazine.

#4. "Orgasm Addict" by the Buzzcocks

Well you tried it just for once found it all right for kicks,
But now you found out that it's a habit that sticks,
And you're an orgasm addict, you're an orgasm addict,
Sneaking in the back door with dirty magazines.
Now your mother wants to know what all those stains on your jeans.

#3. "I Touch Myself" by The DiVinyls

I don't want anybody else,
And when I think about you I touch myself.
Ooh, ooh, ooh, aah.

(Sorry, but I had to...)

#2. "Pictures of Lily" by The Who

I got so sick of having sleepless nights,
I went and told my dad
He said, ‘Son, now here’s some little something’
And stuck them on my wall

#1. "Pump It Up" by Elvis Costello and the Attractions

Down in the pleasure centers,
Hell bent or heaven sent,
Listen to the propaganda,
Listen to the latest slander.
There's nothing underhand,
That she wouldn't understand.
Pump it up until you can feel it.
Pump it up when you don't really need it.


karen said...

nice to see you didn't include the obvious "turning japanese" & cyndi lauper's "she bop."

ken kurp said...


Nadia Chaudhury said...

ahahaha i love that your uncle and father copyedit your entries.

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